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Old October 18, 2014, 08:35:48 AM
Pika25 Pika25 is offline
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Join Date: Oct 2014
Posts: 6
Default Vermillion Pikachus Football

Critique thread here

Chapter 1
Quote:
I am fast asleep in my nice, cozy bed in my house in Vermillion City, dreaming of my idols, the Vermillion Pikachus football team. I am dreaming that someday, I will take this team to a world championship. I am startled by my Pikachu-themed alarm clock as it strikes 7:00 a. m. My breakfast: Pokémon-shaped cereal from Petilil leaf grains in Gogoat’s milk; yogurt from Miltank’s milk; half of a banana, hand-picked from a Tropius; and a glass of Sitrus Berry juice. Of course, we grow Sitrus Berries naturally, in our garden in the front yard. And we do keep a Petilil as a pet (I managed to get one during a road trip to Unova to see the Pikachus take on the Aquacorde Froakies in the world championship at Big Stadium about six years ago), but since we don’t own Tropius, Miltank, or Gogoat, we have to buy those products at a local Poké Mart, minutes away. I’m hyped today because we are going to a Pikachus football game! Our opponents today are the Twinleaf Turtwigs, a team that has gone 3-0 this season (our Pikachus are also 3-0) and this is the last non-regional game for both of us before we move on to region play; the Turtwigs flew from Twinleaf in Sinnoh. We buy our tickets (P400 each) and find our respective seats: section C, row 1, seat 6-8 (mom, dad, and me respectively); I love sitting right along the 50-yard line. On the announcer’s call, we all stand up as both teams’ bands play their respective anthems, with the Turtwigs going first. Then a referee flips a coin to see who decides whether to kick or receive the football; on heads (which it does end up as), it’s the Pikachus. We elected to receive the ball for the first half. Turtwigs kicker Terence Perez kicks it really long, but my man Marquis Ward takes it all the way to the twigs’ 23, before going out of bounds. We get introduced to our offense, as center Christophe Mallard snaps it to QB Aron Judd, who finds a wide open WR Marquis Ward in the end zone for the opening touchdown! We then see kicker Zachery Crawford for special teams to kick the PAT. It’s good and the Pikachus lead 7-0. It is Crawford’s turn to kick off, and his kick sails through the end zone, so the Turtwigs have the ball on their own 20. On the snap by Fred Mesa to QB Richard Brennan (on that 1st down), he throws a flood pass, intended for WR Kit Moore, but it gets intercepted by Pikachus CB Jackie Miller, who shrugs off several tacklers, before being taken down in the end zone at the hands of Mesa. Touchdown Pikachus! Crawford kicks the PAT, and it’s good, Pikachus 14 Turtwigs 0 midway through the first quarter. We decide that now’s the time to buy our lunches from the concession stands: hot dogs made with the meat of a Pignite and the bun from a mix of berries including Pecha and Persim with Tamato ketchup, Kee mustard, and Chesto relish; our drinks are also berry blends (this time with Cheri, Lum, and Oran). Total cost: P960. Not bad for three people! Later on, with 1:12 left in the first half, it’s Pikachus ball, 1st and 10, ball on twigs’ 48. Mallard snaps to Judd. He waits until a WR is open, and he finds Ward in the end zone. He makes the catch, but wait – a penalty flag is down. I have a feeling it’s on the twigs. The call: personal foul, unnecessary roughness, on twigs’ safety Marko Durant. The touchdown stands and Crawford makes the PAT to make it 49-0 Pikachus with 38 seconds left in the half. The Pikachus’ defense holds off the twigs’ O for just enough time to prevent a touchdown. Halftime score: Pikachus 49 Turtwigs 0. Second half; Crawford kicks off, Moore catches it but goes down on his 31 at the hands of Miller. Twigs try to catch up, but anytime they own the ball, they end up going 3 and out. Pikachus move on to win this one, 63-0, sending them to 4-0 (and the twigs to 3-1). So far, all four games have been shutouts for the Pikachus (the first three being 37-0 at the Olivine Lighthouse Ampharos, 61-0 at the Santalune Forest Chespins, and 46-0 hosting the Dendemille Frost Cavern Beartics). Afterward, we pack up and head for the exit. I managed to take notes in my head in case I will represent the Pikachus in a year or so. For now, we do manage to nab the upcoming regional part of the Pikachus’ schedule, which includes their annual rivalry with the Vermillion South Raichus, in what we like to call the “Pika Bowl”. Of course I can’t wait to watch the Pika Bowl just a few weeks from now! Of course I can’t wait to check out their progress in the tournament to see if they can grab a title! And of course I can’t wait to actually play for the Pikachus, no less take them to a championship! Obviously those times are coming very soon, and in that order as well. The Pika Bowl is next week, and the Pikachus are 8-9 in Pika Bowls with the Raichus (the Raichus won the last Pika Bowl 42-41; the title eventually went to the Vaniville Fennekins in a 24-20 win over the Dendemille West Klefkies). I know all this information because I looked it up on a computer with internet, not to mention the pamphlet from today’s game. I’m back in the house, watching news on TV. I’m looking specifically for how the Raichus did (they lost to the Laverre Nature Trail Goomies, 32-28) and how other teams in my area fared (the Vermillion Cave Digletts beat the Petalburg East Ralts, 51-10; the Vermillion East Drowzees beat the Lumiose Prism Tower Heliolisks, 18-16; and the Vermillion Harbor Psyducks beat the Goldenrod Clefairies, 26-24; the Vermillion North Machops were on bye week). We all had dinner consisting of Tauros beef, mashed Payapa, and Farfetch’d leek. (And yes, we do breed Tauros and Farfetch’d here in Vermillion City.) Our drinks are – once again – berry blends (this time Occa, Rindo, and Passho). I spend the evening hours playing games like Madden NFL (I test out a Dallas Cowboys club, and they play just like our Pikachus) and, of course, Pokémon. I wish my very first Pokémon game (which was Yellow) gets a remake, specifically for this current generation. (Fire Red and Leaf Green came close!)

Last edited by Pika25; October 20, 2014 at 11:54:11 AM.
 
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